Almost a week ago, I shared my journey with you guys about the struggles of letting what others think of me, consume me. Update: it’s still hard but, it’s something I am working through with the help of figuring out who I am more and more.
To update you on the prayer jar and self care jar: it has been very helpful. It has helped me to focus a little bit more on me and what I like to do and ensures that I am talking to God every day. It’s the way I start my mornings and if I forget, I do my best to make sure I use the jars before the day is over. Trying to build a habit.
To bring it back around to today’s topic, after having a really tough day at work, I decided I needed to continue to do more for myself emotionally. You see, the little things that have been bothering me (the root cause) has fallen under: people not understanding me or trying to understand me, people not seeing my intentions or thinking they are not genuine, people not taking their time to see the best in me, and people not liking me. Fortunately, It took for today to happen to finally say, “oh well!” Yep! I realized that it doesn’t matter what unimportant people think of me because they don’t matter. I don’t have to go home with them or talk to them everyday; so it should not affect me. I also have learned that when you’re doing great things in life, you will have people who are probably jealous of that and will find every reason to try and knock you down. Don’t give them that satisfaction.
MeMe (My Mom) said it best, ”When you awake, it’s going to be a brand new day. Pick your head up, put a smile on that beautiful face of yours, say your prayers for the day, and finally, don’t let anyone take you out your game. You are great at what you do and are a very kind person. Let the haters hate! And you do your thing. My mom used to always say, “ if someone is talking about you, that’s a good thing because just your name crossing their lips means you are a very important person. So guess what, your blessings are overflowing.” What makes it even better, she signed it from her and my kid 💙
Lastly, I have learned that I can’t please everyone and in reality, I won’t. It’s impossible. By design, I want to make sure everyone is happy with me and it has become so exhausting. As I have stated before, I can only control what I do, not what others do. As long as I am happy and I know my actions are done out of love, support, and are genuine, then I have done all that I can. What is felt after that, is strictly on that person.
So what am I doing to constantly take care of myself:
1. In addition to the self care and prayer jars, I have made a daily tracker to keep better track of what I am doing to take care of myself during the week. I have added on a daily reflection tracker as well, to be able to talk through my day.
2. I have a self care weekly goal checklist that I created. Here, I plan out my upcoming week with things that I want to do, including doing yoga, making sure I’m utilizing my jars, and making sure that I am self reflecting daily.
3. I created a board with positive notes on them, this week, it’s what I am grateful for with a note at the bottom reminding me to control what I can and leave the rest to God.
4. Seeking out help to control the anxiety that I have about this. It’s not easy and it’s especially not easy to go through it alone, so make sure you ask for help if you need it.
5. Remembering who and what is important. Try not to sweat the small stuff. Easier said that done, but it can be done.