Present Not Perfect...

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In this moment, what are you thinking about? If it’s the words that you’re reading, good job! You’re present and in the moment. If it’s what you’re going to eat later, what you have to do tomorrow, or anything ahead of right now, you’re not! Why?

if you’re anything like me, I was raised to always be great and in most cases, better than great. Which means, I was advanced in a few areas in my life. If I felt below par, I would plan and plan things out until I believe I was beyond ready for the next step. I carried this with me into adulthood.  

Which brought me to buying a journal that tells me that I needed to be Present, Not Perfect (Shel’s Daily Do’s) What a realization! I could finally stop being the person who would plan out every single detail of her life, even down to her wedding (I’m talking colors, venues, and flower arrangements already picked out y’all). 

In this journal, it made me also stop being the person who had to always (mentally) be ahead in her career. I’ve always had this “okay, what’s next?” attitude and it stemmed from me always climbing the “ladder”  quicker than most. I was driving myself insane trying to plan the way I would step into my degree field, trying to plan a future with unrealistic expectations, and still have time to have fun, be healthy, and be spiritually intact.  Exhausting is the word I’m using to describe this.  I was mentally exhausted. Which made me physically exhausted. Which brought me to the point of contemplating if I even wanted to be in my career or even in Texas anymore. I was done!

So I decided to be still, breathe, and be present.

Being still allowed me to let God move in my life the way he saw fit. If things aren’t moving and going how I want them to, I take a step back because I know it’s God saying, “Not yet! That’s not apart of the plan!” It gives me peace of mind.

Breathing allows me to calm my anxiety. It slows my thoughts and it allows me to think rationally and be in the moment.  

Being present allows me to type these words to you right now, that doesn’t require me to look so far into the future. It allows me to, as I type, look over and see my kitten do weird little things in order to go to sleep. But seriously, it allows me to not miss moments or let time just pass me by. It allows me to “look out the window” and actually see the beauty in the world we live in and the life that I have. Lastly, it allows me to know that I don’t have to be perfect and I never will be. I’m 24 years old for goodness sake! I AM NOT SUPPOSED TO HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT! When things are supposed to happen, they will.

So, of course, plan for your future by setting goals! It’s okay to set a direction for yourself, but make reasonable and tangible goals where you can celebrate small wins. Make sure to be present and actually feel what’s happening around you. Be so mindful and in the moment, that you are able to enjoy little things, like the taste of your food. Don’t go into autopilot throughout your day because you’ll miss out on so much life. You don’t wanna look back later in life, having missed out on experiences.  

xo. 

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