Damaged...

Are “damaged” people incapable of loving ?.jpeg

Are emotionally "damaged" people incapable of loving again or receiving love from someone who is everything they've ever asked for? I read the prompt in the book I'm currently reading, "Pillow Thoughts" and it sparked a ton of feelings for me. Although I know the true answer is, no, we are not incapable of loving or being loved, we are, however, in a place where we are very reluctant to trusting again. But let's take a journey on why that is...

Imagine giving your all to someone, feeling like you're walking on clouds and if by chance you do fall, that person would be there to catch you. Thats the type of trust I'm talking about. That type of "high" from loving someone can, for lack of better term, cloud your judgement. We start to let things slide and make up excuses for them mistreating us. So when we finally let that person go, probably after years, we are so heartbroken that it is hard to even think about letting someone in again. I say "we" because I've been there before and that last heartbreak was the absolute worst. I'm talking about me swearing off dating for some time and not even wanting to communicate with anyone because of that possibility of getting hurt again. 

BUT understanding that completely shutting down your life because of the way someone else handled your heart is okay for a while, but not too long. I believe in taking time to rebuild yourself, your mindset, AND your courage to date again, is needed because remember, you have to be "whole" and love yourself before you can even think of loving anyone else. You have to create that dealbreaker statement for yourself so you know what you will and won't accept. So, go through that phase but remember to not beat yourself up, because although we all have our flaws, them cheating or whatever else they were doing, had nothing to do with you and you shouldn't blame yourself EVER for someone else's actions.

For those of you who are loving someone who is "damaged" don't forget to be patient, be understanding, but don't let them stay there too long. Give them a reason to love again and smile and trust. Let them overthink for a minute and then reassure them that you're there for the long haul. Most importantly, let your actions speak louder than your words BECAUSE SEEING IS BELIEVING!

Now, go live again; let someone in and they just might surprise you !

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